Small word ignites big work

This entry is to capture my feeling when it is most vivid and truthful about my supervisors, since any delay may blur the sharp vividness.

Before this entry can go any further, a few initial words should be devoted for an explanation of the title I have just thought of. The words I got from my supervisors are not small, and the work ignited is not as big as the language may imply. What is meant is the empowerment my supervisors' saying brings to me. A great contrast of the signifier, language, and the signified, content, is found in their saying.

Imagery words speak much to me. Such metaphors used by my supervisors as diet, flavour, planting tree, fishing,etc. convey meanings far richer than they are intended. A wealth of lessons I learnt ranges from things in my research field to communication etiquette. Beyond the sounds of language (the audio signifier), silence, pausing, pacing, and intervals between stretches of utterance do touch my senses and nurture my mind. What if people do not hold a healthy perspective toward life, a rich wealth of knowledge in their expertise and life alike, a beautiful mind and soul, optimistic beliefs, respect to themselves and others, and passion could produce flowery language? Fragrance is not necessarily what all kinds of flowers possess, I believe.

Critical to this kind of empowerment the supervision brings to me is what and how much I can translate the nuance and essence of my supervisors' saying into my behaviour and action, and how I pass the 'fire' in me to my students/participants.

How do people say what they mean and mean what they don't say?

As a researcher 4

I wish my research area was something about art, or poetry, or design, or music,... something artful, creative, and imaginary. Why do I have such an idea? Because I am surrounded with a wealth of beautiful nature so inspirational and appealing that I can't help being distracted to embrace it with all my senses.

The birds are singing inviting songs, the trees are dancing, the flowers are catwalking on the nature's fashion stage, the breeze is rustling the book in an appealing way, the flower fragrance is overwhelming my senses, the fresh air is caressing my skin, the infinitive blue is soothing my vision, all of them are far too tempting and seducing in front of a me so diligently digging a dark and winding tunnel. No-one would resist to rush out there embracing such beauties and indulge herself. A researcher like me in this climate would like very much to translate those potential strong motives into her research. I am in a good mood, motivated, life-loving, soulful and mindful, but, unfortunately all of the good qualities are being confronted by the reality: my research!!! I am deep in the saying of my supervisor for a PhD student, wrapped compactly in DEAR, Drop Everything And Read! This does not work for me I believe.

The study of the person-in-context relational view of emergent motivation (Ushioda, 2009) speaks much in this situation of mine. Just like a second language learner is not an abstract entity separated from a complex backgound and history and a multitude of characteristics, a me doing research is not a me separated from the beautiful and seducing context of spring in full blossom. The interactive relationship between factors in the multiple system of contexts in which the person inherently belong to makes up her behaviour and the world.

I can't help separating me from this multiple context to drop everything and read! How do I make the motivation emerge? How do I translate the emerging motivation into my behaviour? How do I make all the beauties surrounding me the yeast for the blossom of my research?